China President Calls to Congratulate Biden – Apologizes for Delay, Couldn’t Find Phone Number

China President Xi Jinping called President-Elect Joe Biden earlier today to congratulate him and Vice President-Elect Harris on their recent victory. Jinping apologized for the delay saying, “I looked all over for your phone number. I had it written down on a post-it stuck to my computer monitor, I know I did. It was probably my brother-in-law’s kids or their dog. Whenever they come over for dinner it’s bedlam around here. The kids and the dog run all over the place. That’s it, I’ll bet that darned dog ate the post-it.”

The President of China also let President-Elect Biden know China was committed to working with America to combat the Covid-19 pandemic or the “Screw U, SA-Flu” as it is commonly referred to in his home country in response to Trump’s use of the term “Kung Flu”.

Biden and Jinping agreed that no more name calling would be necessary now that sanity was returning to the Geo-Political stage. They did share a few laughs however, referring to outgoing President Trump as “The Orange Moron”, “Putin’s Puppet” and as a “Beach Golfer” which is a reference to a golfer who spends much of his time on courses hitting balls out of sand traps.