Governor Brown Orders Duck Fans To Stay Inside
Governor Kate Brown ordered Oregon Duck fans to shelter in place tonight saying, “Please don’t show your faces in public. You lost to…
Category: Local
Local news
Jeff Bezos Blamed For Seattle Area Heat Wave
Seattle man Ted Johnson has assigned blame to Amazon overlord Jeff Bezos for the recent heat wave. When contacted by Leuterers for comment…
Local Man Sees Banana Display – Epiphany Follows
Redmond, Washington man Todd Barker recently experienced a profound epiphany when seeing a banana display in a Kirkland, Washington Trader Joe’s grocery store….
Duck Fans Undergo Radical Electro-Shock Therapy to Erase Memory of Loss to Beavers
Twenty six year old Shane Johnson, an Oregon Football fan, sat recently for an interview with Leuterers Sports Editor Tiger Jones. Johnson is…
Governor Urges Duck Fans, “Please Stay Inside”
Governor Kate Brown ramped up her warnings toward University of Oregon Duck Fans. In a statement released early this morning she said, “Please,…
Governor Lifts Restrictions On Beaver Fans
Oregon Governor Kate Brown gave jubilant Beaver fans the green light to party tonight. She released the following statement “Fu*# it, if Beaver…
Oregon Governor Encourages Duck Fans To Turn In Beaver Fans
Oregon Governor Kate Brown introduced her new “Rat on a Beaver” program. The program is designed to help prosecute people for having large…
Local Man Begins Social Media Fast, Experiences Happiness
Alfred Zimmerman, an advertising executive in Redmond, Washington began a social media fast a week ago and is currently experiencing happiness along with…
Man With Large Turkey Arrested Charged with “Intent To Host”
Bellevue, Washington police detectives arrested local hedge fund manager Ted Jensen earlier today as he walked to his car after exiting a local…