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Author: Panther Weinhard

I'm reclusive. Don't bother me unless you have a juicy deal to discuss or a great piece of news for us to cover.

World Turning, Expected To Continue Following Presidential Election

November 2, 2020November 2, 2020 Panther Weinhard

Scientists confirm the Earth is still spinning on its axis nearly four years into the Trump administration. Regardless of tomorrow’s election results NASA’s…

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Leuterers ACME Polling Logo

Latest Election Polling Results

November 2, 2020November 5, 2020 Panther Weinhard

The latest Leuterers/ACME presidential election polling information is in. The results are as follows: Among tobacco chewing, gun toting, unemployed, and educated males…

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Wes Craven Announces Production of New Horror Film Starring Senator Mitch McConnell

November 1, 2020November 3, 2020 Panther Weinhard

Renowned horror film writer, director, and producer Wes Craven announced on Halloween he is beginning production on his scariest film to date. Craven…

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John Heilemann Mauled by Ceramic Chipmunk During News Broadcast

October 31, 2020November 1, 2020 Panther Weinhard

Tragedy struck the popular MSNBC News Program Morning Joe Friday morning  when MSNBC Contributor John Heilemann was attacked by a ceramic chipmunk. Heilemann…

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Michigan Militia Laundry

Michigan Militiamen Cancel Civil War Plans Over Mothers’ Refusal To Continue Doing Their Laundry and Cleaning Their Rooms

October 31, 2020November 9, 2020 Panther Weinhard

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Trump Lies

Trump Lies Outnumber Grains of Sand on Nation’s Beaches

October 31, 2020December 11, 2020 Panther Weinhard

The nations top tabulator Sidney Kuputnik confirmed for Leuterers the Trump lie count now matches the sand count on all American beaches. Leuterers…

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