Leuterers News Service has called the election for Thomas Dewey.
The AP along with Reuters, The New York Times and various cable news channels are scurrying to soon follow suit in their publications. Leuterers Editor-in-Chief Jed Murrow in a prepared statement said, “It was time to put an end to this malarkey. All of us at Leuterers have had enough. We’re putting this baby to bed, calling the election for Thomas Dewey and that’s that. We’re going on vacation and if you don’t like it, start your own unknown and barely seen daily news website.”
Murrow could not be reached for comment and is thought to be on a South Pacific Island in his beach villa with rumored longtime close friend Jennifer Aniston.