Trump Announces Summer Rally Tour Dates – Plans To Build Best “Wall of Sound”

Leuterers Political Desk, Washington, D.C.

Standing in front of an array of scaffolding and speakers,  Donald Trump announced a schedule of summer tour dates. Billed as the “Retribution and Revenge Tour,” Trump plans to rock out some of the nation’s largest venues.

Trump said he has built a “Wall of Sound” to best amplify his message. Trump  described the details of his sound system by saying,

“It’s going to be a Wall of Sound, the likes of which have never been seen. The Grateful Dead had a Wall of Sound back in the 1970’s. Their wall was weak, very weak, very small, not much of a wall. They were a weak band, lots of hippies followed them around. They were weak hippies, not like my followers. As you people know I’m a genius when it comes to building walls. I built more miles of wall than any president. I build them big and powerful, very tall, very powerful. My sound system will amplify my voice to levels never heard before. The amplification will be top rated, my message will be clear. America is weak, very weak. We need a president with a big wall, a very big, huge wall of sound.”

The Retribution and Revenge Tour will start in the East and slowly move out West. The show will feature Loren Boebert’s Cat Juggling, Ted Nugent’s Democrat Guitar Smash, and Marjorie Taylor Green lifting concrete cinder blocks with her pierced nipples. Tickets are expected to go on sale soon.