Electoral Map Reveals Close Race
“It’s too close to call,” said Sally Bradshaw, chief chart reader for Chart Readers and Associates LLC PLC FCC FDA. Bradshaw continued, “When…
Category: National
National news
Whether Re-elected or Not Trump Vows to Raze Mt. Rushmore and Erect Statue of Himself
President Trump today stated regardless of the election outcome he would dynamite Mt. Rushmore to make way for his proposed statue of himself….
Transcendental State Goes To Biden
MSNBC has called the race in the Transcendental State. With 52 % of precincts reporting, Morning Joe host Joe Scarborough declared all six…
If Elected Biden Pledges to Continue Wall To Keep Trump Out
Joe Biden promised today if elected he will continue the Border Wall project. Biden stated to a Leuterers reporter, “There are two issues…
Latest Election Polling Results
The latest Leuterers/ACME presidential election polling information is in. The results are as follows: Among tobacco chewing, gun toting, unemployed, and educated males…
Trump Discovers Water on the Moon. Sells Rights to Nestle.
President Donald Trump has claimed his space agency, NASA, has discovered water on the moon. In a statement Trump said, “Oh they found…
Biden Gives Speech to Pony
In an effort to reach out to more voters presidential candidate Joe Biden stopped his tour bus in rural Pennsylvania on Saturday. According…
Citizens Prevent Disaster on Texas Roadway
A group of concerned citizens joined together Saturday to pull over a Joe Biden bus headed to a Joe Biden rally. Apparently there…
John Heilemann Mauled by Ceramic Chipmunk During News Broadcast
Tragedy struck the popular MSNBC News Program Morning Joe Friday morning when MSNBC Contributor John Heilemann was attacked by a ceramic chipmunk. Heilemann…