Leuterers International Desk:
In a shocking revelation today, former President Barack Obama stated in a press conference held in Stockholm, Sweden that he was in fact, not born in the USA.
“I wasn’t born in Hawaii, I was born in Sweden. Yes, I am Swedish and that’s not all. My name is not Barack, it’s Bjork. The Barack thing was a product of the DNC thinktank. And that was some pretty, uh, pretty good thinking, am I right? Well, they were right.”
When asked why he had decided to reveal this now, Mr. Obama answered, “It’s about Donald Trump. You know, he’s been getting hit pretty hard in the press lately and yes, he does hit himself. But hey, everybody deserves something and I wanted to let him know that he was right and right all along. About me.
“I’m Swedish. My name is Bjork And I love Sursstromming. Which is a wonderful dish of fermented Baltic herring. Herring from the Baltic sea. Michelle can pickle that up like nothing you’ve ever seen. She’s a real pickler, that Michelle.”
Stunned reporters had no immediate questions. An undeterred Mr. Obama continued with, “So here’s what I have to say to Americans. I’m sorry, but hey, I think it all worked out in the end. And from here on out, I want to be known by who I am, by who I’ve always been. Bjork Obama. Bjork from Sweden.”